“I’ll forgive, but I’ll never forget”
I’m not sure where this phrase, this idea, this sentiment comes from – but I’m quite sure it isn’t Biblical.
In Matthew, Chapter 18, Peter (the official spokesman of the 12) asks Jesus a rather pointed question: “Lord” he says, “how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him?
There are a few things that sort of ‘stand out’ – in the way that Peter phrases this inquiry:
1) He clearly makes a very sharp (and self-righteous) distinction between him and the offending party. How so? First, by his ‘ordering’ of the sentence. Second, by his contrasting of specific behaviors, patterns, character. Look at it again:
“How often shall my brother sin against me….AND…how often shall I forgive him”
2) Immediately following this simple but leading question – Peter gives his own response: “Up to seven times?”
Translation: “Check it one time JC – your boy is killing it. He goes above and beyond what most would consider ‘righteous’. Am I right?!?! Now, give me some love – let it be known who’s setting the tone for your followers.”
3) Why does Peter settle on 7? Why not 5 – 13 – 29? Simple – 7 represented accomplishment, completion, perfection. This harkens back to Genesis and the creation of the world. 7 is God’s number right? Peter is just preempting Jesus’ response with the right, the Sunday School, the gold-star answer.
Jesus’ reply, response, standard – like we’ve seen throughout Matthew’s gospel – raises the proverbial bar…exponentially: “I do not say to you, up to seven times…but up to seventy times seven.”
BOOM!!! “Peter…I love you bro, but you’re a Christian Butthead!” (Okay, maybe that’s more Mark Arant than Jesus).
Jesus (gracious, patient, calculating) gives an answer that raises up and chews up and swallows Peter’s answer whole – and then he colors it in via story. A king, a slave, an exceptional debt. No means to repay it. And looming consequences.
But wait. This king – he offers compassion, release – he forgives the debt.
This slave, this pardon, this second chance. Certainly he will go out rejoicing – it will change his life forever – he will pay it forward – right?
And yet…it doesn’t – he doesn’t.
On the other side of the same situation - he is harsh and stubborn and unwilling to forgive. Only (and here’s the rub) this isn’t the same situation at all.
This evil slave owed the king Ten Thousand Talents. Check the margins of your Study Bible people – just One Talent adds up to more than FIFTEEN YEARS of wages.
Verse 28 says, “But that slave went out and found one of his fellow slaves who owed him A Hundred Denarii; and seized him and began to choke him saying, ‘Pay back what you owe.’”
A Hundred Denarii adds up to – get this - One Day’s wages!
Of course in Jesus’ story – God is the compassionate king – the One who, when dishonored and devalued and wronged…immeasurably – chooses to forgive…immeasurably.
And we (His sinful, His debt-incurring, His helpless slaves) must do the same - even though, it will never be the same. A Hundred Denarii simply can’t compare to Ten Thousand Talents
Jesus’ last statement of this chapter is sobering. He says, “My heavenly Father will also do the same to you, if each of you does not forgive his brother from your heart.”
‘From your heart’ is more than telling. To say that you’ve ‘forgiven’ – but that you will ‘never forget’ - what does that communicate about the condition of your heart?
The king forgives, and then he forgets, and so must we – seventy times seven.
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